How to let go of the past and move forward

Letting go is difficult. We usually want to hold on to what we know, that which is familiar. We do not want to become uncomfortable, we do not want to face uncertainty. We hold on tightly to what it is that gives us a sense of familiarity. Whether it is a job, a habit, a relationship, a friendship, our past, a certain physical location; it is difficult to venture out.

It is difficult to start over. Uncomfortable is uneasy. We ask ourselves: what if we don’t make it, what if we do not find another job, what if we do not find another friend, what if the past is all we know? We get into a cycle of worry, of ‘what ifs’. It is a disheartening situation.

But do we ever wonder if that job is good for us? Is that friendship worth it? Is that habit we are used to edifying? Is the past we are holding on to good for us? There are many things that pull us behind or make us stagnate that we have to get rid of. Growth is painful. Uncertainty is uncomfortable. Starting over is hard. Yet, most times, it is usually in our best interest.

When we hold onto something that we should let go of, we become static, stationary; we cannot move forward. We cycle around the same spot. Time goes forward but our situation remains the same. We remain who we were 10 years ago. We become stuck in life, which is one of the worst things that can happen.

Letting go involves letting go of control. We cannot control anything or anyone else apart from ourselves.

We let go of situations we cannot change, as hard as it may be. We face our fears. We face what is holding us back, we face our weaknesses, we fall down but rise up again. We face loss, we face disease and illness, we face the uncomfortable. How can we defeat what we do not face? How can we overcome what we cannot admit to ourselves?

Letting go is not giving up; it is acknowledging that the situation is out of our control, it is acknowledging that what has happened did actually happen. It is acknowledging we were wrong, that we made a mistake, that others hurt us, that we are facing loss, that we are facing a limitation, whether physical or otherwise.

We have to know where we are so that we can move forward. We have to process things out otherwise we will be walking like a shell; not knowing where we came from or where we are going. We say, yes, this has happened, what is the way forward? How do we go on from here? What is the next step?

When we reach our end, there we find God. The amazing thing we realize is that God was and is with us every step of the way. God gave us a free will and He empowers us to go the right way when we ask Him to. The enemy wants us to get defeated, to keep matching on the same spot; he wants us to declare defeat. But that is not God’s plan.

Our end enables us to realize we cannot do anything by our strength, we need God.

We hold on to things and people out of fear and a lack of faith. We hold on and try to control people and circumstances. We hold on out of our lack of understanding of who God really is.

God intended that they would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him. Yet He is actually not far from each one of us. For in Him we live and move and have our being. Acts 17:27-28.

What we hold on to, we idolize. God created us to worship Him only, and if we do not understand this truth we will start manufacturing idols in our hearts. When we are far away from God, we start worshiping other things; we will look for people and circumstances to fill us. No wonder we hold on! No wonder we have a problem letting go!

Things and people will not fill the God-sized void in us that is only meant for God. This is so powerful. It is a powerful awareness.

We are supposed to surrender to God first, and He promises us all other things will be added to us. God is the only One who can fix us.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalms 147:3.

God is the only One who can make us whole. When we surrender to God, He takes over. We let go and stop trying to control. We do not give up. We just let go. We do not settle. We keep doing good. We press forward. We seek God, and when we do, we find Him and He directs our paths. We walk in accordance with His will. We let go of ‘our way’. We surrender.

God’s way remains the only way.

Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who carries out wicked schemes. Psalms 37:7.

When we walk without God’s help, we run into trouble and destruction. God knows best.

Woe unto the one who quarrels with his Maker – an earthware vessel among the vessels of earth! Will the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you doing?’ or the thing you are making say, ‘He has no hands’. Isaiah 45:9.

Letting go and surrendering to God is nerve-wrecking. It involves letting go of what we can see and walking by the assurance of what is unseen. It involves walking by faith. We believe God is who He says He is, we believe His promises will come to pass, we believe He works for our good and for His glory.

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those of those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6. 

When we let go, we do not go murmuring. We wait patiently for God. During the waiting process we keep doing good, we serve as God directs us, our hearts are renewed. God gives us a new strength.

We do not rely on people or circumstances, we rely on God. We let go of what He directs us to let go of, and we trust Him to work everything for our good. With God, we cannot go wrong. When we let go, anything that had a stronghold in our lives loses its power.

Blessings.

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